the “adult switch”


It was a Monday, and the teddies had been planning this for months. T’was the day Kerensa was shooting a music video for her song “Imaginary Friends”. A tribute to them and her multiple other metaphysical companions who primarily dwelled in other dimensions. Brownie, Brian and Barry headed to the park with fresh fur cuts, camera ready and looking forward to another wonderful adventure with their friend.

Also there were a couple other teddies but they were extras who were happy to do a free gig but that’s not important.

Little did they know, t’was the day Kerensa was due to become an adult.

The day began beautifully. They shared cake and sipped from the finest charity shop china in Kerensa’s comfort box, until one day, Kerensa happened upon brought fur babies. Dogs, a new kind of comfort. Something less metaphysical and could wear and look cute in a taco outfit from Amazon. Kerensa’s “Adult Switch” flipped, and the teddies went from being her best friends to mere collections of cotton and canvas. The fur babies were natural hunters, and tore apart the defenceless bears. The two extras didn’t stand a chance.

Brownie had been with Kerensa since the day she was born, and was a gift from the human that birthed her. This meant Brownie was safe and would be loved forever as their bond was strong. Barry was a fast runner and hid behind a tree, and Brian…well, Brian wasn’t so lucky.

Without getting too PG, Brian’s head was ripped off and used as part of a poetry recital and his stuffing ripped from his headless body to ward off any trespassers who wanted to crash the video shoot. The two fur children held on to the bodies of the two extra teddies and their bodies still haven’t been found.

Brian is now known as “Ghost Teddy,” and is paw-sitively nailing the phantom pranks. Kerensa’s phone chargers, socks, and bobby pins are never safe. Samba music plays from the piano at 3 am (witching hour) waking her neighbours and getting her passively aggressive noise complaints. A voice like what can only be described as a screaming chipmunk on shrooms reminds her of embarrassing things she did 5 years ago so that she can’t fall asleep. She deserves this.

Barry and Brownie remained friends and Barry sought therapy to help him deal with the trauma of the event. Not only had his human stopped embracing her inner child but he’d lost a friend. He now goes by “Sad Teddy”, because that way when fellow stuffed animals ask him why he changed his name, he can warn them of the horrors that await the second humans grow up and forget about what made them happy as a child.